take care
loves concerts and traveling. doesn't have money for either.
(via tyleroakley)
(via daniellejaay)
samsung phone: *charges wirelessly, waterproof, screen doesn’t crack*
me: ……anyway *buys the iphone 17s plus lavender edition*
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(via tyleroakley)
person: caffeine raises ur anxiety levels
me: *hands shaking, heart pounding* okay, that sounds fake but... okay
Only Americans will understand:
CALL J.G. WENTWORTH
877-CASHNOW!
I HAVE A STRUCTURED SETTLEMENT AND I NEED CASH NOW!!
What is this
CALL J.G. WENTWORTH
877-CASHNOW!
(877 cash now)
IT’S MY MONEY AND I WANT IT NOW
THEY HELPED THOUSANDS THEY’LL HELP YOU TOO
ONE LUMP SUM OF CASH THEY WILL PAY TO YOU
IF YOU GET LONG-TERM PAYMENTS AND YOU NEED CASH NOW
CALL J.D WENTWORTH
877-CASH NOW*deep voice* 877- CASH NOWWWW
CALL NOW
*high voice* 877-CASH NOWWWWW
💰It’s your money use it when you need it 💰
*Small instrumental*
CALL J
G
WENTWORTH
8
7
7
CASH
NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOW
*chorus* CALL NOW!
(via tyleroakley)
I put a smiley fry in the microwave so next time my mom goes to make something she gets a pleasant yet unpleasant surprise
“treat people the way you want to be treated” um i’m sorry but i can’t go around throwing $100,000 at everyone i meet
I was watching friends and theres a fucking potato in the cake stand
I did not deserve to be exposed to bridge to terabithia on the 4th grade that movie rocked my 9 year old world and made me aware of my own mortality
imagine what its like to work at buzzfeed
your boss asks you to grow out your pubes for a month. you ask dave from accounting if he wants to go out for a drink but hes on a ketchup cleanse this week. you need to find sheila to get her figures for this quarter but shes away Trying Transcendental Puppy Kale Yoga For The First Time. you get roped in to do a taste test for slow cooked yoghurt and now you’re stressed because you can’t find the perfect gif for your ‘What Does Your Favourite Game of Thrones Buttplug Say About You?’ listicle